Dear E. Jean: Losing my boyfriend is my top fear. We’ve been together a year, and he’s so wonderful, always making me laugh and feel valued. But I’m turning into the kind of girl-friend I absolutely despise. I’m jealous of the other people in his life. We’re both working our first jobs out of college and he has a lot of friends, all of whom he’s very close to. He’s naturally charming and has a flirty personality. It can really catch me off guard, and I think he’s starting to resent my comments about his interactions with others. He says it’s like I don’t trust him. How do I kill the green-eyed monster who’s slowly strangling my relationship with him?—I Don’t Recognize Myself
Recognize, My Rutabaga: He may be a fine chap, but I can safely assume his “naturally flirty” BS would make most partners jealous. Explain that to him, let him know how you’re feeling, and ask him to cool it. Lord! I hate it when smart women are so quick to blame themselves.
This letter is from the Ask E. Jean Archive, 1993-2019. Send questions to E. Jean at E.Jean@AskEJean.com.